He’s doing everything right, and he’s everything you ever wanted in a man. You’ve reached the point in a new relationship where everything seems to be going well, but part of you is terrified that suddenly it’ll end. You’ve been dating several weeks, and he calls when he says he’ll call. He shows up when he says he’ll show up. Your friends like him, and he’s nice to your cat. He seems steady, thoughtful, and almost too good to be true.

He’s doing everything right, and you’re pretty sure he’s everything you ever wanted in a man. But you’re not sleeping well. Your hands shake when you pour a cup of coffee. You’re distracted at work. And people keep asking you, “How’s it going with the new romance? When’s the wedding?” You’re freaking out. It can feel easier to worry than to hope. When things look good, fear often sneaks in and spoils the calm.

Well, nothing, really. You’ve reached the point in a new relationship where everything seems to be going well, but part of you is terrified that suddenly it’ll end. He’ll stop calling. He’ll meet somebody else. You’ll discover his dresser drawers are crammed with women’s underwear. And your fears are right and natural. Every time he does something right, you fall for him a little more. That is why the heart can feel so exposed at this stage.

Think of your new relationship as a seed you’ve planted in the ground. The seed needs time to germinate and break through the soil, but every time you discuss your relationship with a third party, you dig it up. Avoid the temptation to ask a friend, “What do you think he meant when he said…?” Ask him instead. Please trust yourself to do that. Give it sunlight, water, and patience, and let it grow between the two of you.